


a ticking bomb

by mysteryshack



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Late at Night, M/M, this can be interpreted as romantic/platonic/etc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-03
Updated: 2019-02-03
Packaged: 2019-10-21 14:30:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17644565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysteryshack/pseuds/mysteryshack
Summary: The moment is momentarily interrupted by Izumi’s soft, “Thank you” which is so quiet compared the noises of the school’s AC and animals outside, Makoto thinks he hallucinated it at first.





	a ticking bomb

“Aaah, that was a really tiring live,” Makoto muses to himself, a soggy towel slung around his shoulders with hair in a mess and glasses uneven and threatening to fall off the bridge of his nose. His question comes out in a bit of a drawl as he yawns shortly afterwards and stretches his arms as a way to alleviate the tiredness. It doesn’t help very much but he welcomes any way to move his body for the moment. At least until he gets home and passes out on his futon -- the thought of sleep right now is tempting, and thinking of his futon makes it more so.

Slumping against the chair as he downs a water bottle, he comes to the very shocking realization that he’s not alone when he hears the even breathing of somebody else in the practice room. Suddenly brandishing the water bottle as if it was a sword (thank you, RPG games), he slowly gets up, feeling less tired and a bit more wary than before. 

The practice room, previously empty when he dumped his backpack and belongings before the live, is also occupied by another student asleep in the corner, body pressed up against the mirror. They were curled up with a jacket used as a pillow beneath their head, curly gray hair strikingly familiar. Oh. It’s only Izumi, and he lowers his arm as he realizes that. Wanting to leave but realizing that students aren’t allowed to be at school in late hours such as these, he decides to go over to nudge him awake. He doesn’t know how he’s always in these strange circumstances but it’s no doubt his bad luck. 

Honestly, it’s a surprise too. He does know how hard of a worker Izumi is (something that’s been blindingly obvious to him ever since he was younger), but taking it a step farther to practice all the way to late night is definitely extreme. Or maybe that shouldn’t be surprising considering that Izumi is most definitely one for the extremes. 

Either way, finding your upperclassman -- one that you’ve been in awkward times with for a while -- asleep would be a shock to anybody. (Unless you happen to be Hokuto and used to the odd things your upperclassmen do on a daily basis.) Raising the water bottle to nudge him awake, Makoto bends over a bit and- 

Oh.

Oh.

Izumi’s face is dry with tears and it takes Makoto a few pregnant beats to realize that he’s never seen him as helpless as this. Sometimes he was truly a pitiful or helpless sight, but this one is akin to a vulnerable child. Swallowing a lump in his throat, Makoto goes down on his knees and sets the water bottle down behind him. It’s not a foreign feeling wanting to take care of somebody but having the awkward character he can’t seem to get rid of, it’s not like he’s particularly good at it. And Izumi’s a special case, because it’s not like he can deal with him at a normal basis knowing that he’s looking at the face of all of his insecurities.

And he doesn’t hate him but dealing with him is like dealing with a ticking bomb. The sort in video games that you can’t help but run away from instead of figuring out and using it to your advantage. He’d love to but it’s something he’s failed with before and even though there is no harm in trying, it’s Izumi and he’s terrible at explaining something normally, how is he going to explain and help somebody who’s as oblivious as a brick wall?

Despite thinking this, he gently pets Izumi’s hair back and whispers, “Izumi-saaaan.” All he gets is a small stir as Izumi’s back rests more against Makoto’s legs which is really unfortunate because he doesn’t want to get caught by Kunugi-sensei. (Also, he’s heard of that one story about the ghost playing a piano and the music room and if he hates anything it’s ghosts, especially because Hinata-kun mentioned it once while they were playing Animal Crossing.)

Sighing, he tries again as he clears his throat and goes, “Izumi-san, please wake up,” but just a tad bit louder this time. 

The second time turns out to be the charm because Izumi’s head snaps up so fast that Makoto’s hand flies back up so fast he’s sure he’s got whiplash. It’s a big surprise to him as well because Izumi’s eyes widen and realizing (think fast, Makoto!) that Kunugi-sensei is still at school so he’d be able to hear anything, he clasps his hand over Izumi’s wide open mouth and hushes sharply. “Shuush! It’s really late,” he whispers.

All Izumi does is nod rapidly, and Makoto lets his hand go, wiping it on his uniform with a final apologetic smile. That seems to be all he’s doing lately, but instead of mulling over that he just says, “You fell asleep after practicing and well. Well….” he leaves it at that and vaguely gestures at the practice room, window reflecting the night sky.

“Oh…. thanks for waking me up, Yuu-kun,” Izumi says, folding the jacket beneath him as he gets up, voice cracking mid sentence. He doesn’t stand up completely because Makoto - stuck between a rock and a hard place - grasps onto his hand out and tightens it on Izumi’s wrist.

He realizes that he needs to say something but his mouth feels dry, words lost and falling back down his throat. Izumi’s wrist is slick against his sweaty hand with expectant eyes staring at him, a beautiful blue color burning into his skull and he discovers that maybe the Japanese language is a bit more difficult than he previously thought. The only thing that tugs him back is the realization that Izumi’s eyes are bloodshot red with dry tears streaked on his face and then he realizes that once he opens his mouth and begins, he’s unable to stop talking.

“I-Izumi-san, you do know that it’s okay if you…. Because you’re crying? Do you want to talk about it? Is it Knights or is it what Sakuma-senpai said the other week and ah…. “ He gets up so he’s eye to eye with Izumi, still holding onto his arm, feeling his face burn. “Do you want to talk about it? Like…. I’m not as good as Nito-senpai or Sakuma-senpai but ahaha… I’m here, right?”

Izumi just stares at him blankly, with a face full of shock and eyes bloodshot red, boring into him. “A-ah…. No, Yuu-kun, I wouldn’t want to infuriate you further! Just get your things and I’ll be out as soon as possible anyways~!” He even tips his head down quickly and raises it with quick succession, accenting the pitiful sight — which is most likely unintentional, Makoto thinks, knowing that Izumi deals with his crippling inferiorities by exercising his authority and maintaining the image of a reliable, older figure.

It’s strange, really, because this is all a big deja vu. He always seems to catch him at his most depressed and Izumi — desperate, unrealistic, and extreme Izumi still didn’t learn and still expected to remove that from his mind, as if pretending something didn’t happen would erase it from the universe itself. But it doesn’t — and that thought is enough to make him grit his teeth and tighten his grip on Izumi’s wrist. 

“You can’t just get out of here with a hop, skip, and a step, though! With a fanciful little ‘Yuu-kun’ and pretend you weren’t crying, are you seriously — do you really think that detaching yourself from all of that and cling to whatever you want to so tightly, you’re going to be happy?” He’s vaguely aware that he’s yelling now and that the pitch of his voice is increasing the angrier he gets. Even though that one teacher — the scary one who’s always yelling at the first years — might find them here, he finds himself not willing to care about that or the consequences. Something far more concerning is right here, and he’s slowly gaining more confidence, drunk in the knowledge that he might finally confront the ticking bomb.

There’s a pregnant pause as Izumi exhales sharply and turns away. Makoto opens his mouth to say something else but he turns back again, wiping his arm over his eyes as his body shakes.

“What am I going to do? You think it’s that easy, just because you’re Yuu-kun: forever thinking, forever aware, and always conscious of what’s happening that you’re confident you’ve made the right move!” Izumi is standing up now, his hands scrunched up in fists, perfect features contorted into anger as his eyes begin to water. “Yes, I’m doing something wrong! Yes, I’m always screwing up! First with you and then with Ou-sama and then— you! You think I don’t know? I don’t know! I’m just going to keep on trying because it satisfies everybody to just say that I’m terrible and dissect me like an insect but how am I going to change!? It’s not just something that happens in… a few minutes! An hour! I’m not a recipe and there is no set of directions for me to follow! But… b-but I’m willing to listen to you! You need to just tell me how”— he’s hiccuping now and his body is racking with sobs at this point as he slowly makes his way to the ground, bunching up the jacket in his fists as he does —“I can stop!” 

Aghast for a few moments at the model in front of him, he gets up and holds tightly onto both of his arms as his hands wander until they reach Izumi’s fists.

“Izumi-san…” he mutters softly, more to himself than to him as his hands get to work unclenching Izumi’s fists, slowly rubbing over his fingers the same way he would’ve done for him many years ago. Something about the gesture relaxes him as well; the repetitiveness of it, and its simplicity takes up only a little bit concentration as he thinks of a proper response. “You do know that you’ve already begun to…? From the beginning of the year all the way to now… it’s only been a bit but you’ve matured — and even though you might not ever get what you’re looking for. And despite it all…” He swallows, trying not to look him in the eye as he examines the pattern of Izumi’s palms to distract himself. And yet…. He’s lying if he says he doesn’t admire Izumi’s efforts to improve himself constantly. That the moments where he’s clumsy and tries his best to fit the image of the glorified self he tries to maintain are always examples of him trying to live up to it and….

“I can’t imagine how much it hurts. But if you asked me a second time who I loved I’d still say Trickstar. Nito-senpai and Hinata-kun as well. All of my friends… maybe even the Odballs, no matter how many times they intimidate me.” He laughs awkwardly. “I’d say you too, I think? I don’t know if it’s the kind of love you want and it confuses me sometimes because I don’t know how to deal with it.”

“Uhyaaa? Wait? You’re not… I’m not an idiot, you know! Yuu-kun, you can’t go playing with my heart like that!” Izumi protests, and raises his leg to step back out of disbelief but Makoto tugs him closer, feeling his face burn.

Just like a ticking bomb, he thinks to himself and tries to ignore how face seems to grow hotter as he drags both of them back down on the floor and says, “Please. I’m not lying. And don’t move, Izumi-san.”

He obliges as Makoto leans against the wall and adjusts his legs into a position fit for primary students and tugs Izumi further closer to him as he cusps his chin with his hands. Taking a few seconds to marvel at his skin and the other boy as his face grows hotter he opens his mouth to say something but then realizes that he doesn’t have anything to say. So Makoto just pats his lap as a gesture for Izumi to rest his head there and when he does — hesitant at first — lay down he eases into the position and sighs deeply.

There are a few minutes of silence with Izumi curled up by him and Makoto runs one hand through his hair, which he figured he would be bothered by at first but after hearing the content hums come from Izumi — which are disturbingly similar to a cat — he goes on, humming mindlessly. The other holds onto one of his hands for a bit as he can slowly feel himself fall into a slumber.

The moment is momentarily interrupted by Izumi’s soft, “Thank you” which is so quiet compared the noises of the school’s AC and animals outside, Makoto thinks he hallucinated it at first.

But he knows he did so he just leans down and pecks the top of his head and says, “Of course.”

**Author's Note:**

> aaah thank u if u read this & pls leave a kudo/comment if u enjoyed it! this was mostly self-indulgent LOL to props to shindanmaker for the prompt even tho i pretty much butchered it


End file.
